Persistance

If you dream deep enough, and work hard enough, pursuing for long enough with an abundance of faith that you will reach your goal, what do you think will be the outcome?

The problem is we want it straight away, right now, with little or better still, no effort. The opposite of what it takes to achieve our goals.

Find an aim, a goal, a dream. Then go in the pursuit of it with an unwavering confidence you will succeed.

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The Dream

A man lay on his bed at the end of his life waiting to die.

His dream came to pay its last respects and to bid farewell to the man who had never realised it. As it entered the room the man looked down in shame.

“Why did you not realise me?” the dream asked.

“Because I was afraid,” said the man.

“Afraid of what?” Said the dream.

“I was afraid I would fail”.

“But haven’t you failed by not attempting to use me?”

“Yes, I did, but I always thought there would be tomorrow”.

“You fool, said the dream, did it never occur to you that there was only ever today? The moment you are in right now? Do you think now that death is here you can put it off until tomorrow?”

“No.” said the man, a tear gently rolling down his cheek.

The dream was softer now, because it knew that there were two types of pain, the pain of discipline, and the pain of regret, and while discipline weighs ounces, regret weighs pounds.

Then the dream leant forward to gently wipe away the tear and said,” You need only have taken the first step and I would have taken one to meet you, for the only thing that ever separated us, was the belief in your mind that you couldn’t have me.”

Then they said goodbye, and they both died unfulfilled.——————————-

Now the first thing you have to do is to find a dream. If you haven’t already. Find a dream that has always touched your heart and never left you since you were a child. Once you have decided on the dream, and it shouldn’t be too difficult, go and get it. Get after it. Take that first step towards it.

A person with great dreams can achieve great things. A person afraid of failure, or of not quite going the distance, or of pain and suffering, or of work and effort. They are bound to an end similar to the one in short story above. And when the end is nigh, it will be too late! The time is now. Take that first step today! Do it now.

I know life is busy. We all have work, family commitments, social activities etc. But our dreams don’t care for excuses. It is very simple, you either achieve it or not.

But what we will all realise when we start chasing after our dreams is that what is most important is not the actual achievement of the dream itself, but the wonderful experience waking up every day will bring. Knowing that we have been blessed with another day to work towards our dream. And don’t let anyone tell you any different!

Visit: http://www.harmoniousdevelopment.co.uk for help realising your dreams!

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Why Smoke!?

I am writing this blog post from my new perspective as hypnotherapist and counsellor. Working with several clients and helping to assist them in becoming non-smokers, as well as looking around at the many people who make the conscious decision to smoke got me thinking… Why Smoke? It is my wish that when you have finished reading these words you take a few short moments to think about this pastime that you choose to partake in. And, ultimately ask yourself the question; Why Smoke?

Some of you may have seen and even participated in a question I asked on my Facebook page. I asked people to answer in a sentence or two ‘why you smoke’? And if you didn’t smoke yourself, to ask someone close to you why they smoke. I was very pleased with the responses that I got and they really helped me to compose this blog with a clear objective in mind.

There were many and varied answers but all were given with honesty and sincerity. Or that’s at least how it came across from where I was reading. Among some of the answers that were given were; I enjoy/like smoking, it gives me a feeling of contentment/comfort when I have finished, it looks good, it relieves stress, its a habit, its an addiction. In this article I will be concentrating on the last two; habit and addiction. To begin with I will give a general definition of habit and addiction:

Habit- An acquired or routine behaviour pattern that is repeated regularly and is often carried out and tends to occur involuntary.

Addiction- The state of being enslaved to a habit or to something that is psychologically or physically adverse to an individual. The continued repetition of a behaviour despite being aware of its adverse consequences.

Many people who answered my question said ‘its a habit’, or ‘its an addiction’. For the sake of this blog we can take habit and addiction to be synonymous. If your uncomfortable with this idea then think of an addiction as an intense or severe habit.

A habit is simply the process of forming a particular behaviour pattern through repetition. Those of you that answered why you smoke because its a habit can probably accept that smoking is just something you do now, or that you have done it for so long now its hard to stop. But habits are of two kinds; positive and negative. Its a very positive habit to clean your teeth when you wake up and before you go to bed. Its a positive habit to wear your seat belt when your driving in your car. To look left and right before crossing the road.

Its equally positive to ingrain the habit of not smoking. Working with people it has become completely clear that there are absolutely no benefits to smoking, and so many benefits to not smoking. Some of the reasons not to smoke; the cost of cigarettes, the health issues that come with being a smoker, the smell, the effect on those around you, the grip that it has on an individual, and more that i’m sure you can think of yourself.

Today is the first day of the rest of your life. In my opinion you can do whatever you desire. You can take up yoga, learn a new language, take a college course, join a gym, find a new job, and on and on in whichever direction you want to go. Equally you can decide to shake the grip that nicotine and cigarettes hold on you. To save your money for better and more productive pastimes (holidays, children, bills etc), and to live a healthier, happier life.

If you feel unable to do this by yourself, hypnotherapy and counselling can help. The process we go through is simple and effective and if you want to become a non-smoker but don’t have the will-power by yourself, together we can work towards a new, healthier, more financially well-off you. Want it and you can have it!

For more information about quitting smoking and many other services visit http://www.harmoniousdevelopment.co.uk I look forward to hearing from you!

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Set Your Sail

It’s not what happens to us that determines our future, it’s what we do about what happens to us. This is a prominent concept in Vedic Astrology; that much of our karma is set even before we are born, but how we react to living out that karma is not set. The two ideas are one and the same.

We can imagine our journey through life as that every individual we see and encounter are in a little sail boat. It will be easy for us to see that it’s not about the blowing of the wind that determines our destination, but the set of the sail. The same wind blows on all of us. The wind of disaster, the wind of opportunity, the wind of change. The wind when its favourable and the wind when its unfavourable. The social wind and the economic wind.

The difference in where people find themselves in life has nothing to do with the blowing of the wind, but it has everything to do with how we set our sail! This is what learning and life lessons are all about, how to set your sail for the better. We can learn from our mistakes and errors from the past and learn new skills and attitudes for the future.

The greatest thing in all of this is that these laws and principles are the same for each and every one of us. The wind will not cease to blow, but we all have the control of our own sail. Eric Worre says in his book; ‘you can tell the size of the man by the size of the problem that gets him down.’ This is easy for us all to verify very quickly. How much does it take to get you down? How easy is it for you to lose confidence? How easy do you give up when things get tough?

Each of us has the opportunity to change right now. This very minute. We can change our income, change our future, change our health, change our marriage, we can change our life. If you make a conscious effort. If you make a conscious choice you can make the next year of your life, completely different from the last year. If you want it you can have it!

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Life is Development

Everything that lives develops. The Acorn into the oak, the tadpole into the frog, the caterpillar into the butterfly. Day develops and progresses into night and the seasons progress naturally from Spring, to Summer, to Autumn and finally to Winter. This process goes on and on perfectly naturally.

We as humans also develop a great deal. From the time of conception up until the time of birth a cell will develop into millions of cells , and finally a healthy baby. This process of development gets our physical body ready to begin life. We are born into a world where we find ourselves completely helpless and require the love, support and guidance of our parents.

Over time we will learn many motor skills, communicative skills, social skills and life skills. We will learn to walk, to talk, to use the toilet ourselves and after many years of care and attention we will find ourselves ready to leave the nest of our parents and begin life on our own. Independence comes in many different stages of life. The first day at school brings a great deal of independence along with it. When we learn to drive and have our own car brings another massive injection of independence which allows us to travel over greater distances by ourselves. All of these processes described above can take place in two ways… Harmonious or inharmonious.

Now things get interesting. As we live, move and have our being, moving through our days, things can slip out of sync. Things can slowly move away from the ideals we imagined. Many people living today, if you asked them if they are living a harmonious, happy and joyous life would answer with an emphatic NO.

So why this answer; no? People have slipped into bad habits. Bad eating habits, negative thinking habits, detrimental relationships etc. And as we get further and deeper into these negative tendencies there can often seem like there is no way out. People say things along the lines of; ‘But I have always been this size and shape, I could never change now.’ or, ‘Its easy to be positive from over there in that nice job, nice home. Try experiencing life in my shoes!’

One thing people must realise, sooner rather than later, is that at any moment we can make positive changes in our lives. We can give up the cigarettes. We can incorporate a new diet and eating plan. We can work towards increased self-esteem. This power to make these changes is within all of us, maybe weaker or stronger with different individuals but ultimately we can make a positive change right now, this very minute.

If you don’t believe me, there are many individuals and many books who will agree completely with the above paragraph. But the important thing is for you to believe me, to understand that this is actually the case. We have control to move in the direction we choose. Yes it may not be easy and straight forward, but the things worth having are not easy to come by. They require work and effort.

If you are interested in turning your life around and creating new positive habits and attitudes, but are not sure you can make these steps on your own. Don’t worry! Here at Harmonious Development we continue to help people to make the changes that they want to see in their lives. And we can help you too!

Come and visit us at http://www.harmoniousdevelopment.co.uk to find out more, to ask a question, or to book an appointment. I look forward to hearing from you!

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Be Productive

Pythagoras was not only behind the equation a2+b2=c2. Pythagoras’ Theorem. He was much more besides. Too much for the scope of this post.

Pythagoras said in his golden verses:
“Never suffer sleep to close thy eyelids, after thy going to bed, till though has examined by thy reason all thy actions of the day. Wherein have I done amiss? What have I done? What have I omitted that I ought to have done? If in this examination thou find that thou hast done amiss, reprimand thyself severely for it. And if thou has done any good, rejoice.”
~ Pythagoras, Golden Verses.

Introspection and retrospection. Very simple but effective practices.

Introspection in the morning, upon awakening, you plan the things that you would like to get done during the day. Don’t be too far-reaching in the beginning, just set 2 or 3 simple things that you want doing or would enjoy or further you in some way; gym, study, reading, communicating etc.

Retrospection in the evenings. Look back over your day and see for yourself honestly and sincerely whether you accomplished what you set out to do. Honesty is a must in these practices, otherwise they are useless.

Before going to sleep, especially if you have something important, some aim or goal that you want to achieve. Ask yourself three questions. Maybe after re-reading Pythagoras’ quote a few times…

1. What would I like to do?
2. What did I do?
3. How did I do it?

I will be trying myself over the next few days and would love to know your thoughts on the exercise. I imagine one of two things will occur; I become super-productive very quickly, or I find it very difficult to keep to the things on my list and soon stop the experiment.

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Uncompromisingness towards your Aim

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If we are completely and firmly convinced that we can achieve a certain goal or aim, what could possibly interfere with this? If we have decided not only on the surface of ourselves, but deep within to resolve or achieve a certain aim. If we do not allow any external circumstances, people or events to distract us from our path.

What could we achieve?

I find clear examples from life that everyone can identify with are; learning a new language, and, getting in better shape. I will use these as examples to paint a picture of someone who has an uncompromising focus on their aim.

A young women wishes to learn Spanish. She knows a little but wants to buy the Rosetta Stone programme and practice at least one hour a day. On paper it would seem relatively easy. But think how many distractions there are; Work, family, social life, hobbies, eating, sleeping etc.

How much does the young women want to learn Spanish? How dedicated and uncompromising will she be toward her aim. Will she decline an invite out with friends if she hasn’t done her hour for that day? Will she avoid the comfort of the television after a hard day at work for an hours study? Will she make up any missed hours on Sunday instead of a family BBQ?

If the answer to these things were to be yes, then progress would no doubt be made. But from week to week, month to month, how many appointments for study would be missed? By seeing clearly the goal that has been set and remaining with her original plan under all circumstances, the young woman would undoubtedly have learnt Spanish in a years time (even with a few misses).

Now, to the man who wants to lose several pounds and start working out. Who has an aversion for burgers, cookies, crisps, beer, trifles, and all manner of sweet things. How badly does he want to loose the weight compared to how much he enjoys the temporary pleasure which comes from the sweet food? This is the equation for success along this path.

We all no how hard it is to eat fresh foods, to eat small portions and eat well. How hard it is to start exercising regularly, to get a routine and schedule together and to strictly enforce it.

During this battle between the ‘sweet and the healthy’, the ‘good and bad’ food he will inevitably come across obstacles. How he overcomes these difficult obstacles will be the factor towards how much weight he could lose.

The more we want a thing. The more firmly and unyielding we are towards achieving a specific aim, the more inclined we will be in taking the hard path. If we just maybe want it a little bit, but are not too sure about that. Or, if maybe I want it, but there is something else. Or its so hard to get there. This is the difference between needing success and being comfortable with failure.

This is ultimately the point of this longer than usual blog. How much do you want it? How much are you willing to sacrifice in order to get there? How hard are you willing to work when you hit the wall and times are tough?

If the answers are what they need to be to achieve your aim, it will only be a matter of time. If they fall short of the universal standard nothing can help you achieve. Not even God the creator.

The power of our uncompromisingness is considerably more effective the more we are convinced of the importance of our aim.

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